Tuesday, February 3, 2009

LESSON THIRTY-FIVE

Lesson 35:

“My mind is part of God's. I am very holy…”

“…the emphasis for today is on the perceiver, rather than on what he perceives.”

Hmmm… what does this mean? If I have learned anything, it is that ‘I’ don’t know.
I have a set of ideas from which to interpret and place meaning ~ theses are authored by my concept of my self. And isn’t that the very thing that got me into this in the first place? I don’t know. The question just begs asking… “Can I really understand? Isn’t my idea of myself attempting to do the understanding through my ‘self-concept’?”
Still, some meaning beyond ‘myself’ sings its lovely melody of truth to me in this statement “My mind is part of God's. I am very holy”; beckoning me home… I am humble in joy at the indisputable simplicity, completeness and tranquil bliss it offers.

The Course tells us that the ego is incapable of understanding anything. And yet, this is where we turn for answers about who and what we are. I mean really… doesn’t this seem insane? It does to me…

As I was reading today’s lesson, a deep sense of peace held me in its belly, while this thought from the Course went through my mind…

“I do not know the thing I am, and therefore do not know what I am doing, where I am, or how to look upon the world or on myself.” (T-31.V.17.7)

This single thought has been the key of freedom which unlocks my ‘self-concept’s’ heavy gates of definition and limitation ~ to the possibility of an open mind~ to the possibility of unlearning what I have taught myself and allowing myself to be taught by a teacher who knows… I think I am beginning to see what He means in Chapter 28 of the text where it says:

“Remember nothing that you taught yourself, for you were badly taught. And who would keep a senseless lesson in his mind, when he can learn and can preserve a better one?” (T-28.I.7)

Everyone makes up a ‘self’.  Well yeah, that’s what this world is ~ the idea of ‘self’ apart from God. But that is certainly not enough, is it? One must design and manufacture a personal self, a unique self, and a ‘special’ self ~ better or worse than the ‘others’. Naturally, along with that come the necessary scales of measurement and hierarchies of values with which one must prove ones worth.
I have been the “self-improvement” business all of my life (oxymoron, yes?)… ‘find the problem, fix it, try harder, be better ~ expose another ‘flaw’; hide it or fix it or hide it till I fix it, add infinitum… and then attempt to help others do the same…and on and on. All my efforts at becoming ‘better, stronger, and faster’ had always been circular in nature. And this is as good as it gets with the self-concept~ the best the world has to offer… and thank God it is so relentlessly unsatisfying! Till eventually, hopefully, we get the feeling we would do anything for a better way.

I love what the Course says about this in Chapter 31 of the text, in the section titled, “Self-Concept versus Self". I invite you to read this section as a compliment to today’s lesson.

“My mind is part of God's. I am very holy…”

Happily, I am beginning to see…to see that there could only be One Cause of my Being. That cause is God. And God has not changed his mind about His Son. And I am his Son, “… complete and healed and whole, shining in the reflection of His Love. In me is His creation sanctified and guaranteed eternal life. In me is love perfected, fear impossible, and joy established without opposite. I am the holy home of God Himself. I am the Heaven where His Love resides. I am His holy Sinlessness Itself, for in my purity abides His Own.” (W-pII.14.1)

“My mind is part of God’s…I am very holy”… Now we place our faith in God through His Holy Spirit in our mind, which reminds us to trust our brothers who are One with us, opening the way to allow God’s mind expression…

 

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